Today...

I had a very good day today. I really enjoyed myself. Seen some old friends(:

Seen some people who don't particularly like me, some people gave me the STANK eye. haha, whatever. People amuse me. I amuse myself sometimes too.

I miss the past. I've been struggling with a lot of stuff lately. I have been a total Hermit crab the past few months. Today is the first time in a while that I actually had true FUN and enjoyed myself. I didn't worry about stuff like I have been recently.

School, grades, family, NHS, Soccer, boys (Josh), my dog, band, "friends". All this has added up, and up, and piled on, and on. I have been so depressed, and I HATE it. I have had no one to vent to about how I've felt. At least no one I've felt comfortable venting to.

I'm tired of my heart aching. I wish I could be happy and cheerful and SMILE all the time like I use't to. But lately, I have nothing to smile about. Recently I just smile because I've always been a smiley person, even when I feel like I'm dying inside. ):

Merh, It feels good to type all of this down and get my nasty thoughts out of me, even venting on my blog, not knowing if anyone will even read this, is better than keeping it bottled up.

Well, thanks for being there for me blogger (: